The Power of Words

This is perhaps one of the biggest changes (everything is related though...) I've made in the past year.

@JillianMichaels

Standing still is hard

I have this horrible tendency to make comparisons (starting to having more consciousness and therefore control over it though). I always compare myself with people I am afraid that are better than me, or that effectively are better than me (for example classmates from my undergraduate course). And this kind of gives me some anxiety, and drive to improve.

However, today, while talking to a friend of mine from my home town (one of my best friends and whom I can trust), now living in Scotland (before he was in Norway, I've written about him before), on skype, I compared myself with people from my hometown.

And man! Me and him, we are two fucking rock stars! I mean, in my hometown, a small city in the central region of Portugal, there's not much place for ambitious dreams. Everyone ends up working for the minimum wage in some factory, or supermarket of cafe, and even those are already full. But we, we took a risk coming abroad, to live outside of our comfort zones. We followed our passions, the passions we have since we were kids. We want to do what we love, because we have something we love. 

And I'm here talking, I had everything. My friend has no University diploma! He worked a few years to save money to take the course (to become a flight attendant)! He more than myself, fought and fought hard! Talking to him inspires me. And makes me want to become better. To become stronger.

No, I don't compare myself to this friend, for starters we know each other since we were 5 years old, and we aren't even competing against each other for a job.

We were kind of the two weirdos throughout school, the anti social kids, the kids who were more reserved, the kids who liked video-games, the paragon of anti-popularity, but now, who's who? Not saying we are popular, that's the last thing I want, but looking at the kids who bullied us, they are below average. And that was actually proven in a study.

S/he who laughs last laughs best.

 I still don't have a job, but I can't fucking wait to see myself wearing a conservative skirt and blazer! Corporate style! Sheryl Sandberg and Tina Fey inspired!

You just wait a little more, World!

#OITNB

My private leadership theory school. eReader non pictured : /

I feel narcissistic today.

Feel more alive

Today I made promising self discovery. Let's just say that up until know I was keeping my mind closed when it comes to possibilities. I made the same mistake when I was in Portugal and I kept on doing it. Until today. Until a few minutes ago.

I just asked myself a few questions and just like that, by answering them, I had an epiphany, a spark of insight and creative thinking.

Anyways, here's an article I look up every now and then.

40 Ways to Feel More Alive

1. Tell someone how you really feel about them instead of waiting because you’re scared.

2. Tell someone what you really want and need instead of building up resentment.

3. Share your fears publicly, in a blog post for example, and ask the community to keep you accountable in overcoming them.

4. Tell a friend your greatest dream, and then ask them to hold you accountable in pursuing it.

5. Admit to a friend how you really feel about how you spend your time—then brainstorm about ways to improve it.

6. Introduce yourself to someone you’ve been dying to meet, even if you feel nervous.

7. Ask someone who’s done what you want to do for advice and encouragement.

8. Tell your boss what you can do instead of wondering if you’ll ever move forward professionally.

9.  Or tell your boss his or her services are no longer needed—then finally start pursuing your passion.

10. Tell yourself the truth instead of lying to yourself about the changes you want to make in your life.

11. Sign up for a class to learn a skill you’ve always thought would be fun.

12. If you can’t afford a class, look on Craigslist for free events related to that interest.

13. Ask a friend to teach you to do something you don’t know how to do—and offer to teach them something else in return.

14. Take that new class at your gym instead of worrying that you won’t be able to keep up.

15. Buy a new or used instrument and look on for instructional videos on YouTube.

16. Think of something you’d enjoy creating—a blanket, a song, or a small piece of furniture—and then do some research today to take the first step in doing it.

17. Write a blog post or take some photos and submit them to your favorite website.

18. Invite a few of your friends to play a sport you’ve always wanted to try, even if you fear you’ll seem uncoordinated.

19. Blast your favorite song and try a dance style you’ve always admired. Nothing makes you feel alive like getting your blood pumping!

20. Make a list of things you think you’d enjoy, and then pick one you’ve never done to try this weekend.

21. Plan a vacation to that destination you’ve always dreamed about visiting.

22. If you can’t afford that, research cheap ways to travel—staying in hostels, volunteering abroad, or transporting someone else’s car, for example.

23. Issue yourself a “life ticket.” According to Tiny Buddha contributor Jamie Hoang, we find ways to pay tickets when we get them because we have to. Think of travel in that same way—and be resourceful to make it happen.

24. Take a weekend road trip to somewhere close you’ve always wanted to visit.

25. Write down your three favorite hobbies and for each, a place you’ve always wanted to try (i.e.: a beautiful beach an hour away for surfing). Plan to go this weekend.

26. Invite friends to a restaurant, bar, or other establishment you’ve wanted to try, but have avoided in favor or familiarity. (Once you invite other people, you’ll be less inclined to change your mind last-minute!)

27. If you’ve avoided going to a new spot because it’s expensive, start a “fun night” savings jar today, and make trying that place a priority.

28. Make a list of fun “staycation” ideas (for daytrips in your area). Schedule at least two of them for the next month.

29. If there’s a conference you’ve always wanted to attend, book your ticket for next year, or see if you can volunteer there to get free or discounted attendance.

30. Plan some type of creativity-driven travel project—once a week or even month, take photos, draw, or write in a new spot you’ve wanted to visit.

31. Jot down three qualities you’d like to possess, then three choices or activities that coincide with them (i.e.: adventurous—white water rafting). Make a plan to do that thing.

32. Enlist a friend to help you face it fear, whether it’s quitting your job or skydiving.

33. Create a positive affirmation to replace a limiting belief (i.e.: tell yourself, “I feel confident around new people” instead of “I can’t meet new people—I’m too nervous”). Then use that new belief to push yourself out of your comfort zone.

34. Think of someone you admire and write down three things they do that you don’t think you can. Now make it a personal mission to prove yourself wrong.

35. Think of something huge you’ve wanted to do, but feared you can’t. Now shrink it down to something smaller but related (i.e.: climb Mt. Everest could start with join a rock climbing gym.) Do that smaller thing today. It’s a start!

36. Ask a friend to describe your potential. Find the parts that make your heart race with excitement, and then take one small step today to work toward that possibility.

37. Set a 30-day challenge—i.e. write 5 pages every day without worrying if they’re any good; after 30 days, you’ll have a first draft of a 150-page novel.

38. Ask yourself, “What would I try if I thought I wouldn’t fail?” Take one tiny step toward that goal today.

39. Ask a friend or your significant other to design an “opposite night” for you—a night when the two of you do things completely opposed to what you usually do.

40. Share something you want to do but think you can’t in the comment section here. Just putting it out there is a great start!

The Paradox of Flow

This is why I want a job, fast. And the reason why summer vacations suck. In Portugal, when I got bored I would go to my family's business shop and just stay there all morning, or all afternoon or even all day (spending some time at the cafe too).

From the book "Flow: The Psychology of Optimal Experience".

As this book has taught me, I'm going to make the best use of my time to gain new insights through reading, to relax and to practice my comedy and reasoning skills though tv dramas.